my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
