Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Randomize
