Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize
