check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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