i just wanna soil my oats bro
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Do vagina's smell?
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize