capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize
