Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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