After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
