i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
