# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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