fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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