That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
Randomize
