One girl and one boy is just not enough.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Randomize
