dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
