I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
