i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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