you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
You can't just leave with hair like that
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Randomize
