I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
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