I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
