And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Randomize
