It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
