did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
