i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
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