I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
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