everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
You made out with two different species that night
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
