Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
