is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
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