i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
