Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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