apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Randomize