xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize