And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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