It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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