thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Randomize
