I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
