Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
