I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Farmville is her only friend.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
