Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I'm pants shitting drunk right now
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Randomize
