just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
