Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Randomize