; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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