I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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