No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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