Is it normal to miss your booty call?
babies were throwing up all over the place
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize