I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
