wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize