Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
