At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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