The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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