People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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